Saturnail

I haven't posted in over a month. But I suppose that's not nearly as bad as some of the lengths between posts. I got a new computer the other day, yay! My previous one was kind of slow & couldn't be used without being plugged in really. I have a borrowed one, but that can't be used unplugged at all. I have been wanting a new laptop for quite a while & have been saving for a little more than a year. Now if I could just get internet at home... Nothing new to report on the weight front. I am wavering between the same few pounds, just under 140. Which might not sound horrible, except that I am so short. So I either need to lose weight or grow taller, lol. I am pretty sure the latter is not going to happen. I requested a few days off from work the first week of April, during my lil one's spring break. We are hoping to head a couple of hours away from us, which obviously won't be an extravagant vacation, but it will be a nice break from work & a chance to get away at least. I hope everyone is doing well. I also hope to have more to report soon. I would really like that report to be that I am losing weight & doing so in a healthy way. I tend to be unhealthy, either eating too much in general, eating to much junky food, or not eating enough. Ciao!

Sprak

I was down to about 134.7 yesterday, but this morning I was up to 136. I blame potatoes, lol. They tempted me into eating more of them. Damn it. I hate carbs in that I love them.

I was so happy to see replies to my post after being away so long. Thank you Tracy & Lu!

I am typing this blog post in Word, than transferring it to notepad on my computer, then I am going to transfer to my phone to copy it. I think this will make it a little easier to post.

I took the day off work. My son's school was cancelled because the back roads were bad (& some side roads in town), so I decided to take the day off also. I will just use some of my eto to make up for it financially. I usually just use eto & vacation time in addition to working instead of taking time off. I think I am going to use some of my vacation time during my spring break to take a trip somewhere. Not sure where yet. I thought about possibly taking my son to see the ocean (east coast), which would be about a half day road trip, depending on where we go. I also thought about going to Washington DC to see some sights (maybe in addition to the ocean), as I've been around the outskirts but never actually there & think it would be interesting. Any suggestions?

I don't have much else to say really, I just felt like posting again.

Sevmons

Wow, can't believe it has been almost 7 months since I last posted. That makes me a little sad. I would prolly post more if I had internet access at home, other than on my phone (which is what I am on now, so please excuse the typos and/or autocorrect mistakes). I wish I could say I have been super focused on being healthy or losing weight but considering I have done nothing but mainly gain weight from eating in excess and junk, that's sadly not the case. As of this morning I am at 135, which is my low for 2013 and in the normal range I have been at the last couple months. My normal weight before I had my son in 2005 was 114 and normal when I moved to this part of the state in July 2007 was 107. I am the highest I have been since starting this blog, though not the highest of my life (I don't think anyways, didn't have a scale for years). So... it looks like.I have got some work ahead of me!

If anyone needs a text email buddy, feel free to contact me...
(989) 372-0146 OR emryelle@gmail.com

Sachurda

When I started this blog approximately 2 years & 1.5 months ago, I was at a horrible (to/for me) weight, 120ish. Afterwards, I lost some of that weight & yo-yo'd, etc. I hate to say that I am now 10 pounds heavier than where I started. It's not my heaviest ever (although it is my heaviest known since I lost pregnancy weight & even a little while before pregnancy, because I don't count my pregnancy weigh ins at the doctors).

If I could make a super sad face emoticon I so would. But instead... :( :( :(

I have no motivation, even though I am totally uncomfortable at this weight & have been wanting it to go back down & even when it has budged a little it goes back up & then some. For the longest while I was maintaining a couple pounds lighter than I am now.

I am hoping July is a good month for me. I would love more than anything to finally find motivation & lose weight. I would super love if I were able to do that without any severe restricting, fasts, or binging/purging. In other words, healthily.

So we will see how it goes. I know it is unlikely I will do it completely healthy whenever the motivation does come (I have faith that it will at some point, I just wish I would reach that point sooner rather than later), & while they may be horrible to know/say, I am hoping by acknowledging it that it will happen less frequently.

On a brighter note, it looks like I will be going full time at my current work place. I covered a maternity leave at the end of last year, which I may or may not have mentioned, & that very position is most likely opening up at the end of July & if it does, it is meant to be mine! So I will get to work more which will hopefully mean more distraction & more money. Which is also good because I am going to have to start paying on the student loans I have been deferring, which I am hoping I can get cut down based on how little I will be making. I am also going to look into getting internet at home again if I get to go full time so I can be online for various reasons (including Blogger). I still get on Blogger a lot to read (through mobile Google Reader), but it's hard to leave comments. So I still read, I just don't really get to post or leave comments. Or do Foto Fridays. :/

Anyways, that's my lil diddy for my periodically rarely posted posts for now. I hope you are all doing wonderfully! I think I am going to start using Twitter again, so if anyone else is there, add me (emryelle) & we can chat or whatever there. Even if you need to vent about ed stuff or life in general or just to say hi. I am going to go delete everyone I think on Twitter & start over, as I don't think a lot of them prolly are even around since most seemed to vacate before I quit checking it out, lol. Anyways, have a great July! Hopefully 'talk' to ya soon! :)

Whiney Wah

Who has some extra motivation they can share with me? I really, really, really need some. Please? Pretty please? I'd love you foreva!

My weight has been creeping up over the last however many (too many) months. Slow, steadily, & speedily at times. Ugh. I can't tell you how many times I've tried to get myself on track. Sadly, there have been too many times that I gave up, gave in, and/or said screw it.

My clothes are horrible. Most are not-nice looking, more so than before. I barely have any pants I can wear, especially for work. It sucks. But it's my fault.

I am by no means depressed. Side note: if I were, it's likely weight loss would be easier since I am more likely to restrict, have no appetite, etc when I am stressed/depressed. Not that I want to feel that way just so I can ensure weightloss, so not worth it. I'm not depressed. I am disappointed in myself, that I let it get this bad & that I am not doing anything to change it. I am frustrated that I lack motivation.

Let's talk some numbers. As of this morning, I was at about 126.7 lb. Which wouldn't be bad, except I am under 5' tall & it puts my BMI at about 26.5, which is classified as overweight. To be at the high end of normal, I need to lose around 7.5lbs. To be at a weight I feel mostly 'comfortable' at, I need to lose about 20lbs. My goal is somewhere in the 90s though (will see when it gets near).

So I am visiting my blog to post a whiney/complain-filled entry. Because I can't/won't talk about it in the 'real world' & I know so many of you can/do understand what I am going through. I love you all. I still read blogs even when I don't post. But since I do so from my phone, it is hard to comment. I really need to look into the possibility of getting some internet up in hurrrr.

Hope ya'll are having a fabulous week/weekend ahead! :)