I feel... I don't know the word for it. I'm not sick. I feel blah, I guess. Physically mostly. I'm not depressed or in a bad mood or anything like that. I just don't feel like doing much. Like being lazy, except that physically I am actually a bit tired as well. I shouldn't be, at least I shouldn't have been all day long. I didn't work today, slept in until almost 7:30am (normal time for me to wake on days off, when I work, it's anywhere from an hour to 3 hours before that). I laid down half asleep/resting for about 45 minutes this afternoon. And I didn't do much of anything.
I'm sure it's partially because I don't eat better or drink enough water or sleep well at night (I wake up often throughout the night, sometimes have issues getting to sleep as well). And I'm sure the extra weight doesn't help either.
I wish I could steal energy from my child. He has so much of it, surely he doesn't need it all. And I could get oh so much done! That would be glorious.
I need to get off the couch soon, so I can move a load of laundry from the washer to the dryer & start another load with my work clothes into the washer.
What an exciting blog post this isn't, lol.
After work today, I had to pick up my son from his grandparents' house. Among the chit chat, his grandma mentioned how she had recently gone clothes shopping for an event she has coming up. It disappointed her that she not only had a hard time finding something she liked, but finding something that fit/looked the way she wanted it too. She resolved that she needs to lose weight (not that she's obese or anything though, not at all).
I hear that, feel that pain, etc. It's why I next to never buy clothes these days. Most of what I have doesn't fit anymore or looks horrible or I feel icky in it or a combination of the aforementioned. I don't buy new things because I feel like that is accepting it more than I already have. I did buy some work pants from Goodwill so that I would have more than 1 pair that I could still wear to work.
I have got to find that motivation, it's somewhere in me. I know it is. It's come out before. And I've felt in moments, for a day or so. It just doesn't seem to stick.
I have internet at home again! It's been like 2 years. Since then, I've had to rely on my phone & 'borrowing' internet at other places. I hope to stick with blogging, should be easier now that I can do it from home, any day.
I'm in horrible shape. Literally, lol. I weighed in this morning at 140 pounds. Which a lot on my not even 5 foot frame. This isn't a surprise to me; because although I have not been around the blogosphere so much, I have most definitely been around/on my scale.
I'd like to lose weight, I'd like to do it as normally as possible. Eating better. More quality food, less quantity (at least of junky food). More movement. I'd like to steer away from severe restriction and/or purging. We shall see. I have weight goals set, but there are not dates for any of them. I would like to look at them like stepping stones that I am allowed to take my time with.
I am going to go weed thru my blog list. Delete any that don't exist any longer, who haven't posted in some time, or those I don't have permission to view, etc. I currently have 139, I expect I will have a great deal less by the time I am done since I haven't been around in so long, & I imagine many have gone or been gone, etc.
Is anyone still around that has me on their list? lol. Hope all is well!
EDIT: I finished the deletion round. Down to 20 blogs. So many were just nonexistent. I kept pretty much anyone who had posted in 2013. Gone away with 119 blogs, wowsa.
